I’ve never promoted myself as a feminist. In fact, I really don’t even consider myself one. I’m more of an advocate for equality. Which is why I get so frustrated when people go around declaring the expectations of a man versus the expectations of a woman.
Over the weekend I had dinner with my boyfriend, his roommate and his roommate’s girlfriend. The conversation somehow ended up on what we would and wouldn’t do when we “grew up and got married”. I, very strongly, voiced that I’d do the laundry but my husband would have to fold. Or, I’d get up one night with a sick kid but my husband would have to contribute his fair share as well. Pretty basic stuff, right? Wrong.
The three of them (not so much my boyfriend… he knows better ; ) ) proceeded to talk about how even though equal distribution of chores is important, it’s still a woman’s “job” to take care of the kids and clean and do those kinds of things, while it’s the man’s “job” to handle the fixing and outdoor stuff.
I must’ve left my apron and obedient housewife attitude at home that night because I responded with a resounding “Hell no!”
Being a woman does not mean I will cook, clean and be the sole care taker of children. In fact, to the man who does one day marry me, I hope you’ve got some kitchen skills because my cooking abilities are pretty weak!
I am not against women doing the cleaning or cooking or anything really – But when the expectation is there that she should do it solely because she is a woman, I get bothered.
When I mentioned I have a small desire to keep my own last name when I get married, you would’ve thought I told them I planned on having a leg removed to be studied for science!
What are your beliefs? And what are your own expectations within a marriage/relationship or household? Are mine far fetched?