I have a story. The kind of story that will make my grandfather, when he reads this, resume his lectures on why I’m an alcoholic when I see him in a few weeks for Thanksgiving. But fortunately, with enough wine and turkey, I’ll be able to tune him out (kidding..).
Now I’m not proud of this story, but I do think there’s enough humor and embarrassment attached to it that I can’t not share it with the blogging community. After all, it’s stories from The Frenemy, So Caroline Says and Hyperbole and a Half, that shine with their self-directed sarcastic humor.
It happened back in June. I should note that I was an emotionally vulnerable and inquisitive person at this time. I was new to the city, the pace and the job. I broke up with my boyfriend to spend time focusing on myself and dealing with all of this “newness”. I was also in the middle of an apartment hunt, which, as any New Yorker will tell you, is enough to drive you instantly insane.
One night, after looking at a few different, but equally disappointing, apartments in 95 degree weather, I decided to meet a friend out for drinks. I wasn’t particularly close to this friend, he went to college with my best friend and my (at the time ex) boyfriend. But we had hung out before and I wanted to go out and leave behind the notion that I was going to end up stuck with a hole-in-the-wall apartment. Before I met the friend out though, he texted me to see if I was okay with who we’ll call Mary, coming to drinks. Mary was my boyfriend’s girlfriend all through college. I knew a lot about her and had even found out too much as a result of self-confessed Facebook snooping where I got a recap of their breakup three years before.
But at this point, I didn’t really care if Mary would be there. My boyfriend and I weren’t together and she had since moved on herself. I was fine with it. Or so I thought. It turns out I was far more nervous to be around her than I thought. And what’s a 23 year old’s solution to social awkwardness? Group shots of course! So we drank and drank and drank some more, until Mary and I were laughing side by side with each other, joined by the bond of Jose Cuervo. It was great!
Until that final tequila shot. Bad idea. It immediately came back up. Mary, being my new best friend, helped me clean myself up in the bathroom and then we all went back to our friend’s apartment on the Upper East Side. At that point, the trip back to my apartment in Queens seemed much too far, so I stayed at our friend’s place for the night… even sharing a blanket with my bestie Mary!
Unfortunately, the night didn’t’ end there. ..
To be continued!
