When you’re little you think the answers will come easily. You’ll go to college [knowing what you want to do], fall in love [forever], get married [forever], have babies [two girls one boy] and live happily ever after. But you don’t consider that in between these life-altering milestones are gray areas. What if you go to college undeclared? What if your first love is still a love but not who you marry? What if you don’t want to get married right away? What if you don’t know where you want to live, let alone where to settle down? What if you find out you have a difficult time having children?
Too many what-ifs. Too many gray areas.
For someone as indecisive as me, those gray areas create a lot of nights of tossing and turning. We know the goal is to be happy, but how do you decide what makes you happy? And why is it that when you find one thing that makes you happy, the other pieces in your life don’t measure up?
For a long time I was happy in my romantic and social life, but unhappy in my career. Now I feel happy in my career, but question the durability of my relationships.
Why the gray area? Why can’t they come together, black and white, together?
You read books and blogs, see movies and tv shows – all of which you can scream at with an overwhelmingly sense of wrong and right for the character. You know when they should be doing X and not Y.
But real life isn’t written like a book or a movie. There’s no script to edit and no plot to amplify. You take it as it comes.. including the gray areas. How do you handle the mix of black and white?
Guess what bloggies? I’m moving to NYC! In what’s been a crazy two weeks, I’ve accepted a position at a PR firm in Manhattan… and I couldn’t be more excited. So in a fitting manner to the changes in my life, I’ve changed my blog look too.
I’ll keep you posted about the journey (good and bad!) but for now, it’s time to tackle my growing to-do list.
City-bound in three weeks!
I’m terrible at sitting still. I’m one of those people you dread going to the movies with. I ask questions throughout the whole thing and shift positions in my seat about 17 times.
And while moving around during a movie seems like a minor thing in the grand scheme of things, it’s entirely reflective of my life. I can’t sit still.
I thrive on change and progress. If I’m not doing something new, I’m not moving forward, if I’m not moving forward, then what am I doing? Don’t get me wrong, I love routine, and let’s be real, I work an 8-5 day job sitting in a cubicle, I’m not that adventurous. But when something loses its appeal or I can no longer get excited about things, I get frustrated.
I love drinking my cup of coffee every morning, but like to change who I drink it with. I love going to bed early with a book every night, as long as the furniture in my room has been moved around every few months or so.
I date guys who I consider myself madly in love with for a couple of years and then decide it’s not doing it for me anymore, and move on to find something more exciting.
Why can’t I sit still? Why do I need something new?
Everyone says that when you find something, and someone, that is right for you, you’ll know. But I’m not sure how I feel about that. Maybe I should just embrace the fact that I need change and find a job, and a relationship, that changes with me.
Do you thrive on change? Or are you in favor of a solid, unchanging, routine?
Saw this on Lemondrop and loved it.
Especially number 5: “Imagine the Possibilities” Think of every interest that you have ever wanted to pursue but have never found the time, then try a few. I bet we would be very surprised if we added up the countless hours that were spent on unhealthy, destructive relationships. A Buddhist adage says something like: “If you weren’t thinking about that which makes you unhappy, what would you be thinking about?”
too often we spend our breakups mourning what we’ve lost instead of thinking about all the things we can gain. Have you been meaning to read a specific book but just haven’t gotten around to it yet? Go to Barnes and Noble and pick it up! Wanted to go hiking? Grab a girlfriend and go for a day trip. The possibilities are endless. Turn your focus to them.
read the rest here: 5 Tips to Surviving a Breakup